I am using KHX1333C9D3B1K28G (2 stick kit). I get the 3 beeps & flashes. Amazon sent me replacement RAM today & at the moment I have four sticks non of which work alone or in any combination.
I plan to call OEMXS.us on Monday, but I can't imagine what to do about the RAM in the meantime as all my other systems are DDR2 & I have no ability to test. I triple checked all wiring, & the system (E8400) worked great with my other board.
According to the Kingston Memory page for your motherboard here , that stick part number is not on the list of supported memory so no wonder you're having problems. You'll need to check the manufacturers website to make sure the sticks you get are compatible. Intel have a web page about memory for the DP43BF as well so make sure those specs are also followed. Although 1333 memory is listed as suitable for overclocking, your best bet if you're having troubles is to stick with the basic non-overclock memory and default settings to suit.